Monday, October 17, 2005

Blues Continue

I wish I could say this weekend was great, but it wasn't. Actually it was one of the worse weekends I've had in a long time. My depression continues, I'm having difficulty sleeping and eating. My attention span has gone down to zero, I cry at the drop of a hat and those things that use to give me comfort no longer do. I'm going to see my doctor tomorrow, this cannot continue. I'm sorry this blog has become such a downer, but I suppose blogs do reflect our emotions, feelings, well-being and this is the stage I'm at right now. At the same time I feel guilty for even having these self-pitying moods when there are so many people out there who don't have the luxuries of indulging in any feelings beyond just making it through another day, trying to find something to eat and to stay alive. It was simply a chance of birth that allowed me to live better than 95% of the world's population, I could have ended up a daughter of a poor Nepalese farmer, sold into sex trade (another sign of depression, always go to worse case secenario). Sigh.

But this weekend wasn't without at least one funny incident - on Sunday I was manning the Democrat's table at the local farmer's market. This middle class WASP, thin, jogging suit wearing woman came up to me early on in my shift and asked "What is Tim Kaine's stance on abortion?" Internally I wanted to hit her "duh lady" I felt like saying "he's a Democrat, what do you think, you freaking moron?" But instead I said "He is pro-choice." Well, this was just the opening she wanted to go off on how he is not a Christian, he is going to go to hell for allowing that, how can he do that, blah blah, I tuned her out. Actually I was looking for rocks to put down on the pamphlets since it was so windy, hence I just ignored her. I think this really pissed her off, cause she ended with "you're going to hell also for supporting him." "uh-huh" I said back, not even looking at her. I was really engrossed in finding those rocks and I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of taking the bait. I'm sure she was dying to get into an argument, I could have cared less. She left in a huff. Ahh joy......nothing puts a smile on my face faster than annoying sanctimonous, holier-than-thou, born again religous fanatics. Really as she left I should have shouted out, "if heaven is going to be filled with people like you, than I'd much rather be somewhere else!" I need a bumper sticker to that effect......

10 Comments:

Blogger Tony said...

Sorry you're so down, love. Wish I could make it better for you, but I send you lots of hugs and good thoughts! :-)

8:42 AM  
Blogger Merci said...

VG, I'm Christian, and I'm proud to be acquainted with someone who gave some of her free time to work for our freedom. And, for the record, I'm a Democrat. A pretty liberal one, at that. That lady didn't really want to know your candidate's stance on abortion. She wanted to spew hatred at someone, and she posed her question to create an opportunity to vent her anger on you. Sorry you came up against such a sicko.

Hope you start to feel better. Lots of good thoughts going your way today!

10:42 AM  
Blogger PaxRomano said...

Cheer Up, I will not have my V.G. wit da blues!!! (Going to have to cook up a new sing-a-long!!!)

On the other hand, you should have tossed a rock at that harpy at the flea market (God save me from your followers!!!)

10:54 AM  
Blogger Francesca said...

I'm sorry you are feeling down, but from the way you ended your email, it shows you have a sense of humour and a desire to be positive. That helps, big time!

I went through a funk over the past few days and this morning I got up and DECIDED I am going to pull myself out of it. The human mind really is amazing because we can will ourselves to do almost anything, it's just tapping into that energy and determination to make a mood shift.

They say happiness is a choice and I do believe it, but sometimes we all struggle with making the right choices.

Anyway, hope today is much brighter and filled with laughs and smiles for you.

Take care!

11:05 AM  
Blogger Random Kath said...

VG:

Would it make you feel any better to know that I'm going through the same thing? I send many, many hugs! {{{{Virginia Gal}}}} It is going to take a week or two to see if the sleeping aids and allergy pills have any effect on my moods, but I think they are starting to help a little. Your doctor should be able to help you out a bit - have faith!

I also know that crappy circumstances don't help, and that you are trying to manage a lot of your own expectations now . . . it is a not fun process, so do take some time to be crabby . . . we're human and allowed to sometimes, you know?

As to cranks who come up to your table at events - I've certainly dealt with enough of them, and you dealt with her just fine . . . she just wanted someone to rant at, and you gave her that. I wish I could have been there to see this woman's face as you went on about your business! This is also one reason I would never run for office - any loon with an opinion feels free to come up to you and spout, and you have to sit there and take them seriously and not blow up at them, ot it will end up on the 5 o'clock news.

Better times are coming, my dear . . . your friends are sending happy vibes your way!

11:11 AM  
Blogger o0ohso0ocrazy said...

"It was simply a chance of birth that allowed me to live better than 95% of the world's population"
see now tat is wat im probably gonna think about next time im buying jeans.thnks.no jk.it is a good statistic.i guess we should use that 5% of good luck to change the other 95%, for ourselves and those living in it!
btw:ur comment cheered me up on my blog.
stay positive!!
naema*
p.s.i loved that like snack cake stuff i had.im deff gonna hit it up at giant.

10:00 PM  
Blogger Virginia Gal said...

Tony - hugs from you always makes me feel better :-)
Merci - a liberal Christian, egads you're as bad as me, a liberal Muslim, hee hee. Thanks for the good thoughts!
Pax - oh a sing-along, love them! and yes we must do something about some of God's more rabid followers.
Francesa - oh so nice to see you! Thanks for stopping by and for the advice, you're right I've gotta stay positive. How goes life as a Dr btw?
Random Kath - I swear we share a brain, so true about about controlling expectations, it is hard, thanks for the hugs and good thoughts. Hopefully soon you and I will get out of our funks and enjoy victory parties for the Dem's this November in our great state of VA (full of weirdos!).
Naema - I'm glad I was able to cheer you up! And next time I see you I'll try to bring the snack cake mix :-)

7:58 AM  
Blogger Belinda said...

UGH. Someone who would tell someone else that THEY are going to hell for their support of a political candidate is obviously so clueless as to be beyond/beneath anything you could have said to her, anyway, so you did the right thing. Sorry you had to be the "target" for this loaded shotgun.

5:44 AM  
Anonymous hgh said...

good info

11:53 AM  
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8:42 PM  

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