Aye....my Pro-life Friend
On today, World Refuge day http://www.theirc.org/media/www/world-refugee-day-irc-events.html, I thought it appropriate to blog about a friend of mine.
Car and I have been friends for ages, since childhood. During our high school years she coverted from one religion to another and since than has become, well lets just say very devout. Despite our very polar and political differences we have remained friends. I like to think its because we agree to disagree (and she prays for my soul, which doesn't bother me, hey I could use all the prayers I can get).
Anywho, the cruz of the problem is that recently she has begun sending me these pro-life propoganda emails. They are forwards, so its obvious she is just checking me with everyone else in her address book. I suppose what bothers me is not that she is trying to "convert" me to her way of thinking on this issue (I was pro-choice in high school and have only gotten more passionate in that direction as I've gotten older); what bothers me is that she expends so much time on this non-issue. She's a "religious" person and I know she means well, but I wish she would spend her time fighting for the here and now.
You know what I would respond and appreciate more is a "Save Darfur" email - you know how much more good would come if she and people like her worked for this issue rather than something so abstract (meaning that abortion is not going to be solved nor is there an immediacy to the situation like Darfur).
So on this World Refuge Day, with 40 million people worldwide uprooted because of violence or perscution, I hope Car and people like her stop and think "maybe there is a better way to advocate life than sending silly emails, maybe I should fight for the already living."
posted by Virginia Gal @ 11:32 PM
9 Comments:
Well put, kid!
Remember what John Lennon said, "Imagine all the people, living for today".
But in her way of thinking she is saving millions of lives by preventing abortions, which is a much larger number than lost in Darfur.
Don't say she isn't making a difference - most states, and our federal government, do prevent abortions and have an impact worldwide on abortion funding and family planning. Some reports list the US reluctance to teach about sex, as opposed to abstinence, as helping the spread of aids in parts of Africa.
I agree with Virgina Gal - All the energy, time, and money spent on the issue could do a whole lot of good if it were instead spent helping people who are already here and in dire need of any assistance they can get. There are so many children out there dying of neglect, malnutrition, abuse, etc. Once those issues are taken care of, and we are all taking care of anyone who needs, it, then by all means, let's start helping those who haven't come into the world yet.
well here is yet another point of view to ponder. I am with Car on this subject, but am not a bible thumper about it. She has to do what she has to, as you have to do what you have to do. This is probably the banner she has picked up to fly.Don't we live in a great nation that all can have a point of view! and the ability to talk about it!I LOVE THE USA
I am pro choice all the way and get quite incensed with anyone on the other side of the fence... those who know me and disagree know it's best we do not even broach the subject for the sake of the friendship... politics and such ideas need to be set aside for those that are different and you are very wise to know this amiga mia!
And yes, we should spend our time much better than sending out such morose emails and wasting our time so!
Yeah, biased? Me? FO SHO!
I absolutely hate the term "pro-life." I am very much pro-choice, but also think of myself as being pro-life - I oppose the death penalty and war, send my money to support environmental issues and organizations like Amnesty and IRC - what is more pro-life than that? But part of my concern for life includes giving women the right to govern their own bodies. Free and readily available birth control for all is best, but no one has the right to say a woman must continue an unwnted pregnancy. And even the best birth control is not 100% effective. Is your friend ready to adopt all those unwanted babies? I'm guessing not. Is she saying that all unmarried women should be consigned to a life without sex? I'm thankful I've never had to face that decision, but I damn sure take issue with anyone who would take the right to make it form me.
I suppose I am pro-choice in that I believe each person knows in their heart what is right for them and their situation. After all, it's between them and God.
Pax - thanks - love the John Lennon quote!
Joe - aha! I think i didn't verbalize it properly but you have said what I mean, if she and her fellow emailer's would exercise that much energy into saving Darfur just think what a difference they would make! And I guess my argument is why can't they do that? Perhaps they could help the fetuses and the living people both? Wouldn't that be the greatest act of faith?
Darla D - since we discussed this Friday I won't go in depth with my response to you, but hear hear, I agree completely with you!
Mommanator - yes it is nice to be able to have free speech and I suppose that is the banner she has chosen, I guess this is just one of those times where I just don't see it...I feel like she could be using all that great energy and passion for something, in my opinion, more here and now.
MizBohemia - well as we are totally sisters, I agree with you, silly emails are just that silly and it is best to set aside our differences for the greater friendship - you and me zealously pro-choice, hee hee : )
CS - Hear hear, I am pro-life but in the idea that let the person make their decision and you're right, Amenesty International is completely pro-life! We need to realize that we must take of humanity even after they are born, life doesn't at just getting born, no?
Brenda - Amen, it is totally between them and God - that is beautifully said.
It's one thing to share a deeply held belief with a friend in a respectful context; it's another to constantly try to ram your point of view down someone's throat.
You can pray for someone without telling them about it. Prayer is a private moment with God, and using discussion of it to manipulate others ("I'm praying for your soul")shows a lack of spiritual maturity. Frankly, it's the act of a wolf in sheep's clothing: hostile, aggressive behavior disguised as an act of love and kindness. And it often backfires. The passive-agressiveness of it often has the result of making the subject of the prayer angry and pushing them away from religious beliefs.
Unfortunately, some denominations teach their adherents that all true believers are used by God to convert people. If you don't have the scalps of saved souls on your belt, your faith is in question.
Does she respect what you believe enough to really listen to you when you talk about it, or do discussions always come back to the superiority of her belief system and the need for you to convert and be saved?
I might have to post about this sometime soon...
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