Past Loves
Not sure if I mentioned that about a few weeks ago I found out that the guy I liked, infatuated ( my London guy), got married? Well he did...at least that is what I heard from a second source.
I'm bummed by this news despite the fact that he and I didn't even keep in touch that much, I think the last time I talked to him was at New Year's and that too, I didn't even know it was him ( he called to wish me a happy New Year and I was like "who is this?").
Lately all I can do is think about him...and how perfect my life would have been if only he had seen what a great catch I was (yes in my imaginations I am a great catch). Our lives would have been exactly what I wanted, close circle of friends, warm home, smart, funny kids (like a tv sitcom).
What is wrong with me?! Is this normal when you hear a so-called ex has moved on...found someone else?
I feel like Sally in that movie...When Harry Met Sally, when she cries about how the boyfriend who told her he would never get married - gets married, to another girl. You suddenly feel inadequate, though in my case....rumor has it that he married a distant relative, family pressure. Is it wrong that I hope this girl is a witch and ugly?
Right, classes start tomorrow, so my brain will be focused elsewhere...one can pray, no?
posted by Virginia Gal @ 9:13 PM
9 Comments:
Better to daydream.
OMG good thing you are going back to school. However I dont think anyone ever forgets their previous love interests. Me included and I have been married 37 years!
So my conclusion gal is that you may be normal LOL
I agree - absolutely normal! And of course, any guy who fails to see what an awesome catch you are should be condemned to life with an ugly (and grumpy? Can she be grumpy and maybe chew with her mouth open - oh - and spit whenever she talks?) witch. Oh, I feel much better now, on your behalf! :-D
Married 36 lonnnnnnggggg years here and it ain't all it's cracked up to be so take your time!
Good luck with your classes this semester!!!!!
Married ten years and though I love the man to pieces there are days (like some continuous ones right now) when he could use a good whack upside the head and me a BREAK!
I kid you not...
And kids are fabulous but once they come around you are lucky if you have time to even fart! Vulgar but oh so true!
And if ever you follow on piece of my advice, it would be to get this book:
"Excuse me, your LIFE is waiting" by Lynn Grabhorn.
Cheesy title but a friend of mine (Neva, whom I met in the blogosphere!) sent it to me when I was badly down back in Spain and it has worked wonders! FABULOUS!
Nothing wrong with you, with your feelings, NADA! But there is so much we can do to not fall into the funk... and you seem to be wired very similarly to me so get it! If something got through my thick skull...
;-)
All this to say you are very much loved FO SHO so go on and kick some ass in school!
Besos...
Virginia Gal, it is normal, but eventually everyone ends up with the person they need to be with. Have faith . . .
Good luck with your first week back! Many happy vibes are being sent your way!
sorry boo <3
but if it wasn't meant to be, then use it as a stepping stone and move on. =]
youll find someone BETTER, i promise!
naema
some thoughts:
* your fantasy life is ALWAYS 10,000% sexier and happier than it is when it arrives.
* it's totally normal to miss him. heck, i love Honey more than life, and i still have little piney pangs for my long-gone crushes. and there are swaths of time which are anything but daisies and rainbows, but more often flies and swampgas but ...
* ... crushes are human and it's easier to get over them if you remember that they have annoying habits. invent some. i like to think that the boy i should've professed my love to in high school has a habit of belching loudly at restaurants and then rating them. i can't imagine dating someone like that. maybe you could imagine some intolerable habit or worldview and attribute it to him. then you can think: Thank God I was spared having to slog through life with THAT!
* also, if this guy is so lily-livered as to cave to family pressure, would you really want him? seriously? don't you want a mature ADULT who makes his own decisions as to what's best for HIS life? again: consider yourself spared.
* AND: you ARE a catch. (even though you're the only who can't see that!) and when you do find your perfect match one day you'll realize that the extra time you spent in the stream has made you the most treasured fish in the river!
Joe - yes daydreams are lovely!
Mommantor - oh God bless you, it is reassuring to hear I am normal...sometimes you think "am I the only one feeling this way?"
Darla - thank you for such sweet words "any guy who doesn't see what a great catch you are.." and I laughed out loud, chew with her mouth open, hee hee.
Brenda - 36 years, amazing! Thanks for reminding me again that its not all fairy tales and pink ponies. : )
MizB - thank you darling, yes we are wired similarly (which makes me hopeful for the future, cause you have such good kids and a loving marriage) and I shall have to get the book for sure. Thanks for the love!
Random Kath - thanks for the happy vibes...yes I like to think we do end up with the one we are suppose to be with...I just hope someone is out there for me. I send happy vibes back to you as you start your school sojourn! Rock on!
Naema - you are so sweet...I do hope I find someone better and not have to marry someone just so they can get a green card for America (you know how it is)...keep praying for me - thanks man!
Molly - I am laughing at the belching story, hee hee - you are so sweet, I love the rish in the river quote, thank you so much, reading it was like being enveloped in a big hug, which I can always use.
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