Thank you all for the lovely congratulations - yes this whole thing is sooo overwhelming!!! I miss being pregnant, when I could sleep! Someone asked me the other day what I would like as a gift for my birthday, I replied a full nights sleep without waking up worrying about baby.
I do feel so blessed to have been given this baby but I just feel so overwhelmed, this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do! I think I could even scale a mountain at this point and it would be easier, because there I would only have to worry about myself!
Also I find my emotions are up and down all the time, people say this is to be expected, one second I'm ok, the next I'm crying over nothing. I keep the television on, it calms my nerves. Right now I have some grandma help which is heaven sent otherwise I would be a wreck but I'm nervous about what happens when grandma goes home. I just don't know if I can handle baby on my own. I know thousands of women before me have done it, but it just seems so hard!
We just saw an advertisement for stoneware pots, how funny, eh? A television ad about
kitchen gadgets shows me that the world continues to go on even as I swirl around in my worry (which has me so stressed that I can't seem to eat). On top of which, natural feeding is not coming at all! I so wanted to be able to do that. What a failure as a mommy am I!
Right, sorry about this rather negative post - its only reflecting my current state of mind.